Sister, we need to talk.
Sex is everywhere*. But you already knew that. You are probably here because you want to know what the big deal is, how you fit into the whole equation, and how it all works.
Made in God’s image, we as women have a marvelous template to follow as we journey through this life as daughters, sisters, friends, wives, mothers, aunts, and more. Our Heavenly Father is kind, generous, courageous, powerful, humble, strong, and so many other things. He put these stamps (and many others!) onto our lives, personalities, callings, and talents and with His strength, we get to live out our journeys in these different and varied roles as women.
I don’t think we talk about sex enough in the right ways, at the right time, with the right people.
This isn’t just for you married gals, either. With all the twisting our culture has done with everything relating to sex and sexuality, it’s no wonder single gals feel like they can’t talk about it without being labeled, married gals feel like they can only talk about it with their husbands (and most rarely even do that), and there is just a general sense that intimate topics are somehow dirty, tainted, and overly private.
One huge problem I’ve encountered as a woman – both within and outside of the Christian community – is a lack of healthy, positive, and real conversations about sex, sexuality, and everything else relating to intimacy.
In regards to how Christians handle sex, I count myself among the lucky ones. I experienced the abstinence campaign(s) of high school youth group, got “The Talk” from my dad (which was great), worked through one chapter in our premarital counseling talking about intimacy with my soon-to-be husband, and was given a handout (with pretty good explanations) about how natural family planning worked. With my science background, I knew where things went and how it all worked but that was pretty much it when it came to sex. There were more than a few things nobody told me…couple that with physical difficulties I didn’t foresee and I was in trouble.
Then there’s how the rest of the world handles sex. Seen a cover of Cosmo or Self lately? You’ll find at least one “how to be better in bed” article (or something similar/more provocative) on each. Or perhaps you learned nothing in your public high school health class’ portion of sex ed because, well, we really only have time to teach you what to do if you get pregnant/get a girl pregnant (oh, the pregnancy options lesson) and how to not get STDs (now called STIs to be more politically correct).
A safe place to come to get your questions answered…
Single or married, virgin or not, loving sex with your husband or despairing because sex hasn’t been all it’s talked up to be, this site is for you. Think about just about anything you’ve ever wondered – or have been too scared to wonder about – that has to do with sex. And sex is not just about how far you can go with your boyfriend before marriage. God created us as sexual beings and has a grand plan for our lives whether we are sexually active or not. We’ll talk about the philosophical side…
…but really hit on the science side as well. As a high school science teacher, I realized just how many women don’t understand how their own bodies work. Yes, I’ve had the pleasure of teaching teenage girls about their reproductive system but as a result of my science and teaching background, I’ve had countless friends and family members ask me question after question relating to their hormones, reproductive and sexual issues, and more. Do they not have anywhere else to go? Did they not get a solid explanation in their younger years? Whatever the case may be, it is imperative that we as women understand the amazing design God used to put us together and especially how our reproductive system works.
You need to talk about IT.
It’s no accident that the abbreviation for this site is IT. Things surrounding sex are often euphemized by saying, “Did you do it?” or “How was it?” and it just so happens that we really should be talking about IT. There is no replacement for a close friend whom you can ask your most difficult and intimate questions. Perhaps you do have that friend but an issue comes up that she doesn’t have wisdom in yet so you don’t know where to turn. That’s where Intimate Truths comes in. This is a place where you can learn about your body, ask questions, and find answers to things you needed to ask but just hadn’t realized yet. We want to encourage you in your physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental health when it comes to your sexuality.
*If sex makes you uncomfortable (giggly? frustrated? ashamed?), do me a favor and go somewhere private (bathroom? back porch? in your car?) and say the word “sex” as many times as you need so you can keep reading about it. Trust me, it works. When I taught sex ed in a public high school, I started off the unit by having all the kids plug their ears and repeat whatever anatomical terms they needed to say as many times as necessary so we could actually get some learning done without interjecting tons of giggles.